He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
