Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
he was CRYING into my vagina
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
