Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
