so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize