I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize