so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Randomize
