so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
