I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
the night ended with taco bell and tears
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
