is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
