i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
