May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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