YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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