weddingsv make me drug and hornr
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Randomize
