The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
