So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
