I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
