i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
