Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
