I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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