After last night, I could never be a politician.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize