i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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