I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
