David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
