I hate all girls vehemently.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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