Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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