I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
