Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
