So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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