they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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