She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
