He asked to "fluff my boner.."
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Randomize