sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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