How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
