i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize