I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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