If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Randomize
