so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
