"it" just moved
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
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