but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
