Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
