we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
if only i could text you this smell
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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