What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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