Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
