please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
