Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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