Where is the hickey?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize