Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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