you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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