I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
