Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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