i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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