i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
