Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
