I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
